Grabbed from Virtualmvc.
1. Cigarette: A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end & a fool at the other.
2. Lecture: An art of transferring information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through “the minds of either”.
3. Conference: The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.
4. Compromise: The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.
5. Tears: The hydraulic force by which masculine will-power is defeated by feminine water-power.
6. Dictionary: A place where divorce comes before marriage.
7. Conference Room: A place where everybody talks, nobody listens & everybody disagrees later on.
8. Ecstasy: A feeling when you feel you are going to feel a feeling you have never felt before.
9. Classic: A book which people praise, but do not read.
10. Smile: A curve that can set a lot of things straight.
11. Office: A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.
12. Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.
13. Experience: The name men give to their mistakes.
14. Philosopher: A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken of when dead.
15. Optimist: A person who while falling from Eiffel Tower says in midway “See I am not injured yet.
”
16. Pessimist: – A person who says that O is the last letter in ZERO instead of the first letter in word OPPORTUNITY .
17. Miser: A person who lives poor so that he can die rich.
18. Father: A banker provided by nature.
19. Criminal: A guy no different from the rest, except that he got caught.
20. Boss: Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.
21. Politician: One who shakes your hand before elections and your confidence after.
22. Doctor: A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with his bills.
23. Computer Engineer: One who gets paid for reading such mails.
Tags: definitions, virtualmvc
Recent Comments